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Review: Minions

By Christine Petralia

Image courtesy of Universal Pictures

July 19, 2015

 

*May Contain Spoilers*

 

Imagine seeing a foreign film with no subtitles. That was what it was like watching Minions. Granted, you could catch every 10th word and get the gist of what was going on, but it was very hard for me to follow, as an adult. As a kid, you’ll love it! You’ll want to learn to speak Minion and communicate with the cute, lovable yellow creatures.

 

Minions is a spin-off of Despicable Me. They’ve been around for centuries. Their main goal in life is to find a villainous master to follow and serve. However, after following and accidently causing the death of a T-Rex, a caveman, an Egyptian pharaoh, Dracula and Napoleon, the Minions decide to settle down by themselves in Antarctica. They create a great little village and life for themselves, until they get very bored and depressed without a master. In 1968, one of the minions, Kevin comes up with a plan to head out into the world to find the ultimate villain to follow. He needs volunteers and ends up with Stuart, against his will, and Bob, a young minion eager to serve but chosen by default for lack of volunteers.

 

The minions end up in New York where they learn about Villain-Con, which is where super-villains from around the world will gather in Orlando. They hitch a ride from a criminal family who happens to be headed to the convention as well. Down at the convention, they encounter so many choices, but end up with Scarlet Overkill (Sandra Bullock), the world’s first female super-villain.

 

She takes the three minions to her home in London where she instructs them to steal St. Edward’s Crown from Queen Elizabeth II. While stealing the crown from the Queen’s carriage, Bob lands on the Sword in the Stone. He successfully pulls Excalibur’s sword out of the stone and is immediately crowned new king of the United Kingdom. Convinced the minions are traitors, Scarlet confronts them and threatens to destroy them. The minions try to clear up the misunderstanding and Bob abdicates the throne for Scarlet. However, she betrays them and locks them in her dungeon to be tortured by her husband, Herb (Jon Hamm). They escape and yet again mess up and ruin Scarlet’s coronation, instead of apologizing and explaining what’s going on. Scarlet orders the death of Stuart and Bob, but Kevin manages to get away and must save the pair.

 

Meanwhile, the minions on Antarctica have found some yetis to follow, but, of course, the yetis are accidentally killed. The rest of the minions head to London to join Kevin, Bob and Stuart. They arrive as Kevin is accidently turned into a giant and tries to save Bob and Stuart. He manages to do so, and destroys Scarlet and Herb too. Elizabeth is once again crowned queen, and honors the three minions. However, Scarlet, who is actually alive still, swoops in and tries to steal the queen’s crown again, but is stopped by a young Gru (Steve Carrell). Of course, the minions see Gru as their new leader, and start to follow him.

 

It was a cute plot, but as I said, sort of hard to follow when the main characters speak a combination of non-sense, Spanish, English and French. It was fun for the kids, and that’s all that really matters with a film like this. It was cute to see the backstory to such likable characters in the Despicable Me movies.

 

After Dallas leaves the guys for Europe, the male entertainers seek out Mike, who has left the industry, for one last hurrah at the strippers convention in Myrtle Beach.

 

Vince and his crew give Ari something to do when he wants to not only star in the next big film, but direct it too. Things get crazy when the guys go over budget, forcing Ari to smooth things over with financers and get more funds.

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All works created by Christine McGrath; Centereach, New York  All Rights Reserved 2024

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